Catching up....again.

So I am in between projects at work and wanted to take a quick break – I started perusing my favourites and came across my blog. My poor, neglected blog. I started reading some older posts and couldn’t stop. I found myself at the beginning; feeling so pleased with myself that I had documented much more than I thought I had. I have when Gray started crawling; when Gates started talking; Cam’s surf trips; my Nana’s passing; and, for timing sake, a very special moment – my Mimi’s 91st birthday celebration at my house. I instantly got the bug to start blogging again. Quite certain no one reads this and that is simply OK by me.

I remember this time last year I printed all my blog entries and put them in the mail for my Mimi. Although a bright and with it lady – she was technically challenged. Or should I say, couldn’t be bothered by silly things like computers. But I wanted to share with her my thoughts, experiences, etc of being a mom. She was pleased as could be with receiving such a package in the mail. In fact, I bet I have a thank you card (hand written, of course) someone packed away. What a special memory.

That sweet lady – my magnificent Mimi – passed through the gates of Heaven on July 6, 2013. While she had become quite frail since breaking her hip in March – I had no idea her time was up. I visited with her on Tuesday, July 2 (coincidentally my mom’s birthday) and we shared a couple laughs and some tears, too. She was still so with it – but I could tell depressed, too. She was living in the Buckingham, uprooted from #18 Stillforest – where she has spent the last 60+ years of her life – 30 of those as a widow. To say she was independent would be the understatement of the year.

In her passing, I am realizing how incredibly blessed I was to have her as a grandmother. Don’t get me wrong- I appreciated her while she was alive, but to see the numbers of people that showed up to pay their respects and share in their sorrow for our (gigantic) loss was amazing. (So many members of Cam’s family came to the services – melted my heart and brought a tear to my eye. Felt like we were one big family – all there to support one another). She would have been 93 next month. I can’t cry too much – she lived a long, beautiful life full of blessings. She got to know my husband and meet my two children. She was proud of me. And she knew how much I loved her. I am not over her death – I am still so very heartbroken, but she has inspired me to live my life full of class, consistently seeking wisdom, and with full appreciation of what God has gifted me with.

Moving on (although I could talk about her forever – in fact, I am not sure I have experienced this level of sadness since losing my mom)…my family. We are all doing great. Cameron had his annual surf trip in April and we were just fine! I couldn’t believe how effortlessly we sailed through his 8 day departure. He was missed – but the work was more enjoyable and things seemed easier.

I am still working as a consultant on a project out at BP. I find myself balancing the work/mommy life quite well – although at times I wonder how much longer I can do it. But we just keep forging on. Cameron is still happy at Charter Title, even though he thinks of returning to brokerage. We will see where the road takes us. The housing market is crazy right now – which comes at a time when we will need to be moving. Gates is 4 (!!!) and even though we will be holding him back from starting kindergarten until he is 6 – we still need to find a (semi) permanent place to land for the next 18 years. We are looking in spring branch – and hope to find something in our price range and with a little room to spread out a bit. This is bittersweet as we have absolutely loved our time on Wynnwood. We have grown as a family, figuratively and literally, and made some really special memories. We love our neighbours and the life we have created for us there. But for our future, we need something else. Really, for the boys’ futures.

Gray is 20 months old and an absolute fire cracker. He looks just like me when I was a little girl. And I imagine our personalities are a lot alike too. He is really starting to talk – putting two words together (eat now, bye momma, etc). He loves his brother, he loves his dad, and he really loves his dogs! Baxter is his favourite. I am not sure what it is that peaks his interest so, but he will follow Baxter all over the house. It is too funny.

Gates is a sweet big brother- he is finally starting to come around. I think the more Gray plays with him and interact, the more Gates enjoys him. Gates still has a heart of gold – it is crazy how sweet he is and how tender. Always wanting to make sure I know he loves me, and he is taking care of me. I hope he is like that all of his life – but I also hope he toughens up a little so the world isn’t so big and scary to him.

As far as our family stuff – we took a fabulous little road tip to Port Aransas for an extended July 4th weekend (July 3 – 7) with several other families. We stayed in a great house with the Porters (Morgan, Kim, Peyton, Beau, and MJ). Tracy and her family rented a house with another family. And The Crossleys shared a house with the Elkins. It was seriously the most fun we have had as a family! It made me realize how quickly the boys are growing up and that as they do, we have more freedom with what we are able to do. We had a piñata, popped fireworks; Cam had a great shrimp boil. We spent time on the beach, time by the pool, and time together. It was great.

We keep toying with the idea of a family vacation to Central America in 2014. I think Trish is on board, so we just need to nail down some dates and book our flights. Speaking of Trish – we are closer than ever. We hardly go more than 2 weeks without seeing her – she makes so much effort to get to Houston to see her nephews and us. We all have so much fun together. I am constantly feeling like we are making such wonderful memories for the boys and building the foundation of how special family is.

(taken in NYC In March)

I am ready for the fall and the cooler temps but I know I have some of the worst Houston heat still in front of me. August will be brutal but time is flying by so I know October will be here before we know it. I am already thinking of the boys Halloween costumes (of course) and preparing for another Christmas (probably our last) in our Wynnwood house.

Speaking of celebrations at our house. We had a successful 4th birthday party for Gates in June at the house. We rented a water slide and planned a surf/luau party. It was a total success, probably one of the best yet. Everyone had a great time and some special memories were made.

In March we had a crawfish boil at the house for Cam’s 36th birthday. That was also a lot of fun – a day filled with special friends and lots of laughs.

As far as Cam & I – we are in a really good place. Not that we ever haven’t been but we have been constantly evolving and adapting to change since we met. We are finally in a settling down phase. Accepting where our lives are now and now focusing on adjusting to all that it is….if that makes sense. We have been a bit reactive and now we can be proactive – or just …. Settled. We have a good group of baby sitters which allows us to do more together. We stay busy but continue to make time for each other. I am reminded how lucky I am to have found him – but I don’t (often) need the reminder. I know I am. He is an excellent dad and a husband – two things he hadn’t really planned on being. God has a plan for us.

The anniversary of my mom’s death is right around the corner. I can’t believe it will be 5 years – still hurts like yesterday at times. And then there are times I feel like my life is so much bigger than the loss of her. Hard to explain. But I still miss her. And wish she could see me as a mom. I think that is a huge thing for a mom – to think of your children as parents. Because you also realize that they understand, at that time in their lives, all the sacrifices you have made for them. I never got to say thank you to my mom. But I know she knew I appreciated her. I hope so. I can’t help but to think she would still be here if I had said it a few more times – or if she had a greater purpose. But maybe that’s it- her greater purpose was to be by God’s side.

My dad and Anne– (the wonderful woman he met the year after my mom died) are doing well!  I think she saved his life …in fact, I am certain of it. And he is happy – so what more can I ask for? I believe they have plans to marry – which I am completely accepting of. I am happy to think of a future with Anne…and the memories she can provide to Gates & Gray. Fingers crossed these aren’t just big dreams and could actually transpire into reality.

And Cam’s family – well they are just great. Joe is such a special father in law to me – I lucked out. And such a special granddad to G & G. And Sissy is the most fun grandmother ever. She knows how to really talk to the kids and play with them. She makes everything fun – I could learn a lot by watching her. Our relationship is so special and has turned into something natural and honest and loving. I know that she is there for me, in the drop of a dime.  it means a lot to have the support that i do in my in-laws.  I feel so lucky.  And Lisa & Colby are doing great, too. We don't see them as much as we woud like to, but it is always fun when we do.  And the boys love spending time with them.

 

The above pics were taken at the ranch in May...one of our most favorite places to be. 
I am glad i got this update done - hopefully i dont wait a year before blogging again.
This is so good for my soul (and my memory)!