Coming out of the Fog

Holy Cow (do people still say that?)! I can't believe i haven't blogged since September. but when i think about what my life has been the last 4-6 months, i can believe it. So this blog will be all over the place but will also hopefully serve as my foundation to keep back on track with this. as i have said in the past, i do this more for myself and memories than anything. and i am upset that i have missed so many months of it - but oh well. i was busy (understatement)!

So i spent my time before baby #2 getting prepared for baby #2. little did i know, there was not enough time in the world to fully prepare for what i was about to encounter. Cam and I dropped Gates off at Sissy and Granddad's on November 2 (I cried the entire way to the hospital) and set off to complete our family. sounds so sweet, right? not so much. We got settled in the delivery room at the hospital and as the nurse was entering in my info into the computer, she seemed concerned when i told her about my back (surgery in 1995, rods in my back, etc). i assured her that my obgyn knew of this and that he promised me it wouldn't be a problem. of course, i started panicking. she set off to find the anesthesiologist to confirm with him that getting an epidural would not be a problem, even with my rods. The anesthesiologist said he would not give me an epidural unless he saw an xray of my back (well, i would not have this baby without an epidural, so it appears we have a problem). at this point it was after midnight and i was exhausted, nervous, and emotional. they wheeled me to another wing in the hospital to have an xray done - and at this point i was 1 cm dilated and they were going to start the potossin at 4 am. after the xray they checked me again and naturally i was progressed to SEVEN cm dilated. are you kidding me?? i knew i was in pain but i had no idea i was contracting that much. Not to toot my own horn but having lived with pretty exreme back pain my entire life, i think my threshold for pain is pretty high. So at that point it was a matter of minutes (literally) for the anesthesiologist to review the xray and give me an epidural, or it would be too late. Because it was so last minute, he thought it be wise to give me the same meds they give c-section patients - which is morphine and epidural. this didn't sit well with me. shortly after receiving meds i started throwing up and didn't stop for probably 12 hours. i threw up the entire time i was giving birth. it was awful. Cam said he thinks i threw up 30 times,....not sure it was that much, but it was a lot. so i don't' really remember much, except misery. sad, right? so that's the delivery story. Gray was a real peach in the hospital - and the rest of our stay was actually very pleasant. we got to go home on day #2 - which was a sweet surprise because we couldn't wait to get settled and have Gates back home, too. But let me just say that i think gates was having way more fun with Sissy and Granddad and he was in NO hurry to come home and not be the center of attention.

The first few weeks were easy and i thought to myself "I can do this. Heck, i can do more. lets have another one." ha!!!! that came to abrupt halt, along with LIFE, when Gray became colicky. I have never in my life been so out of my mind. And we blinked and it was Christmas. and he was still crying. I really think he cried for the first three months of his life. And so did i. Really, i am just now coming out of the fog, as we approach his four month birthday (march 3).

Gray is now the sweetest little boy ever. he smiles all the time and laughs a lot! when he cries (and he still does) it is only because he wants something. Gates is a sweet big brother and really hasn't missed a beat. I do think he is ready for Gray to get bigger so they can play.

Gray is called The Bobi (Bobby) around the house because Gates could not say baby correctly, he said bobi - and so it stuck. so now, Gray's nickname has become The Bobi. wonder how long that will last.

And what else??
The weather in Houston dumps. some people may be OK with it being 85 degrees on March 1 - but i am not one of them. but maybe i would be if we were coming out of a nice winter, but it never even got cold. So frustrating. i hate experiencing ONE season - SUMMER. but i guess i should get used to it, since that is just the Houston is.

I am officially looking for work, again. I might have something in the works but don't want to jinx it so i won't talk anymore about it. please send some positive thoughts my way. I am ready to be back at work for multiple reasons.

Cam and I are finally planning our much talked about trip to Napa. We were supposed to go in Sept of 2011 but, well ... baby Gray happened.
We also already have a weekend booked in early May in Port Aransas. We must introduce Gray to the ocean and beach - so looking forward to it.

Gates is going to a ring bearer this month in Cam's cousin's wedding. I am so excited to see how he does. should be pretty adorable. and we are just excited about the wedding - period. will be lots of fun.

A couple weekends ago the weather was actually pretty perfect here and we took full advantage of things that Houston has to offer (that we tend to forget about). it was SO much fun. we took gates to discovery green park for a playdate with his school friends. then we headed to Hermann park to ride the train (one of Gates' favorite things to do). then we had lunch at the pinebox or pinewood or something like that. we sat outside, right on the pond there in hermann park and enjoyed a delicious lunch! Gates was on his best behavior and Gray was angel, too. it was so much fun. that night, Gates didn't even want us to read any books to him - he was too tired. real cute.

hmmm, what else. Some of my dearest friends have had babies recently too. Kristyna had a precious boy, Raegan. Natalie had Kate (i think i already mentioned that in another blog post). Brooke had baby Kennedy. Tracy will be having Ava on the 8th and Martha will be having #3 any day now. And to top it all off - my best friend Kim found out she is having another baby. we thought she never would (even though she couldn't say she was done with kids) and were so excited to hear of God's plan for her. she really was a big help when i was pregnant with Gates (and after i had him). she changed his first diaper in the hospital for me and taught me all kinds of things about being a mom. she is one of the best - simply because she doesn't allow herself to get all kooky like i have a tendency to do. She is so relaxed and keeps the vibe in her family much the same. Anyway - so it is fn that now i can give her advice on things I've learned since I've had my babies. and i get to pay her back for all the hand me downs she has passed my way through the years. What fun!!!

i feel like i could go on and on but i will pick back up later this week with some more random stuff. i doubt anyone even reads this blog anymore - so theres that, too. :)

here are some pics!
(tried to add pics and it wouldn't let me. no time now, Gray waking up. will try again later).